Daddy Hero

Since day 1 my Ian has been a mama's boy. For the first few years of Ian's life Matt has had to endure many tears and cries for mama, and sometimes even being shoved away and told that he wasn't wanted. He has persisted in being a wonderful loving fun daddy to Ian, even when there were times I know his feelings were hurt over it. Caleb's arrival in our family created some forced bonding between them because I was otherwise occupied, and also gave Matt the gift of a little boy who is very free in his affection - he got lots of hugs and cuddles from Caleb even on days when Ian was pulling out his most mama-clingy behavior. Caleb has now reached an age where he is starting to sometimes prefer mama, though it's never with the intensity that Ian demonstrated it. For Matt and Ian though, in the last few weeks the tides have turned. All the sudden Ian has been crying for daddy during the day, and talks about him all the time. I have been asked when I will go away to work and daddy will stop going to work and come home to take care of Ian all day. Matt has been questioned about when he will retire. Ian just wants his daddy!!! In the mornings for the past two years Ian has jumped out of his big boy bed as soon as he was permitted (and sometimes earlier) and climbed into our bed next to mama for snuggling. Some days it would just be a brief hug before he was off to play. Lots of days he would go back to sleep all warm and snuggled in. About a week ago or a little longer, I became chopped liver. I have been consistently bypassed every morning - he high tails it around the bed to Matt's side and clambers in. I don't even get a good morning.

It may sound like I'm complaining, but I'm not. I won't pretend that I don't often think he's growing up too fast, or miss the amount of affection I used to get, but I am just so happy for the two of them! I know from the child development courses I took in college and the books I've read that this is very normal, for a three year old boy to begin to idolize his father. This is the time when a child is developing gender identification, and I think my husband is a fabulous role model, the very best a little boy could have, in this way. It is a strong sign that they have a very healthy relationship. And I also won't pretend it's not a relief that the one Ian seems to want at the end of the day when I'm worn out, is daddy! It frees me up to either take a much needed break, or to get to stand aside and watch the two of them together, which invariably brings joy to my heart.